would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
