My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
