I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
The convent might be a nice break from real life
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Randomize
