I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
How does it feel to date your dad?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
