If that was your dad, he is hot
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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