Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
We have so much sex to catch up on
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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