How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
