she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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