when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
i think my mom watched the whole time
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
