They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize