No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
The beer is more important than you right now.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
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