I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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