My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
