This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
