You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
two words...techno handjob
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
