I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
