ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Panties = found
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
