is your mom at the bar?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Randomize
