Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
everyone is single if you try hard enough
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
