we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
