I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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