I hate your face
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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