I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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