STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
