That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize