I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize