Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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