well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
