Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
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