just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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