in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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