You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Randomize
