Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize