No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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