return my video game
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
