U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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