shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Randomize
