You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
