this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize