If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
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