It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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