I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
