Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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