Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
