I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize