and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
