She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
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