Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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