as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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