Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
