I want to have your abortion
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
