The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
We need to feng shui this bitch.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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