She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I forgot how hot balto sounded
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize