so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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