Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
